Day #14 18/01/2020
Aaaah, Saturday… Waking up this morning we didn’t really have any plans besides getting a run in and I knew I really needed to get a blog post written! Before heading down my big hill to Mitch’s house I spent some time in the word.
I’ve really been struggling with feeling like a phony “missionary.” Yeah, I’m working with a mobile clinic, and on the outside it looks like a crazy amazing thing, but it really isn’t. I’m learning a lot about life here, learning to appreciate the freedoms that we have in the United States, learning that people do silly things no matter where you are in the world. I feel though, that despite what all these people have shared with me, taught me, and how they’ve served me, I have done nothing that can compare or come close to repaying them. I came here thinking that I would be doing the clinic such a service, but in honesty, I probably only slowed them down. I came here thinking that I would share my service, and have been cooked for and had my shoes washed by people who saw my need. I came here thinking that I would share the love of Jesus to people, but nothing I have done could compare the love that has been shown to me. I know that I have issues being my own greatest critic, but it’s like everything I came here to give, I’ve only received in surplus. After blurbing all this out at once, I am reminded of a later portion of 2 Cor. 9 that I shared a few posts ago: “He who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will supply and multiply your seed for sowing and increase the harvest of your righteousness. You will be enriched in every way to be generous in every way, which through us will produce thanksgiving to God.” Another thing that has stuck in my mind since she said it was Dra. Jennifer told me, “You have to learn to receive too.” At the time, I clung to it but told myself that was really just a way to make myself feel better. Looking back at this scripture though, it seems that it is God’s design for us to receive so that we can continue to be generous.
The rest of today was bumming around, looking into planning a quick trip to the neighboring island of Utila for the last few days for some fun (as if the rest of this adventure wasn’t enough…). We drove around town looking at the various places where Mitch has built homes, churches, and ministry buildings with other missionaries in Siguatepeque. It’s amazing to see what God has done through him and many others to serve these people. My personal favorite was called Melodias des Esperanza, which is a music program for kids to have a good outlet rather than get mixed up in gang violence and just so they have a safe place to go and hear about Jesus.
After our drive around Sigua, it was time for a run. We set out to find some more level ground than the dirt roads of the barrios downtown. We drove around looking for places where the guards wouldn’t get the trucked towed out, and finally settled on the seminary (where Mitch used to work). It was the longest five mile run of my life. I ran alongside the CA-5 (the only highway in Honduras) as Mitch rode his bike with me the whole way. We ran on the shoulder of the highway as semi’s passed us and blew heavy gusts in our faces. The worst of it though was the looks. Now, being a gringa is already a show stopper, but being a gringa in running shorts is like I may as well have been running down the side of the highway wearing no clothes at all. Every single head turned my way, and it wasn’t because me huffing and puffing was very flattering. It’s just a different mentality here in the way that women are treated. I realized how I have been blessed to live somewhere that I am valued as more than being a female or looking any sort of way. If Mitch hadn’t been beside me the whole way, I know that I wouldn’t have been safe. I know that I will not take the freedoms of the United States for granted again. I will appreciate the ability to run down just about any road that I choose without fear of anyone. I pray that this would change here, and that women would be cherished the way that God made them to be.
ENOUGH. 